The Amazing Race to Valencia!

If there was ever a time in my life that I thought I could be a contestant on a TV show, it would be this past weekend. Friday, I started out my weekend with a trip to Madrid! We spent the morning touring the King's castle and let me say, I was extremely inspired by the interior decorating. I saw some of the most beautiful patterns and paintings that I've ever seen in my life. So basically my new goal in life is to become the Queen of Spain because who wouldn't want to live in this castle?!

My future home :)

After viewing the castle and eating at El Museo del Jamon myself and 16 other classmates began our journey to Valencia. Our bus was scheduled to leave Madrid at 5:00 and since it was 2:30 we figured we had plenty of time to walk to the bus station. Well, little did we know, two hours later we were in a residential area with no idea about where we were. By the way, we were being led by three men (hint: men truly are HORRIBLE with directions). So, 15 minutes before our bus is scheduled to depart, we decided to get a taxi (which we should have in the first place) and we luckily made it to the bus about 4 minutes before 5:00. Probably the most exhilarating and stressful situation I've been in thus far in Spain! At this point, I had been running (literally) around Madrid for just over 2 hours and now all 17 of us American students were stinking up this bus to Valencia! Four hours later, we arrive in Valencia and ask the police outside of the bus station where our hostel is and where we can find taxis (because at this point we have learned our lesson not to wonder around areas we aren't familiar with). We successfully get to our hostel and I was so pleased to find out that the hostel was AMAZING! My bed there was better than the bed I have in Toledo, we had delicious paella and sangoria on the rooftop Saturday night, and the people working there were so incredibly friendly! 

The entrance of our hostel...

My time in Valencia was basically spent on the beach since I am kind of obsessed with the sun. I for some reason didn't realize that the beach in Valencia would be a nude beach so to my surprise I saw lots of tatas Saturday! I think this was when it really truly hit me that I'm not in America anymore because I spend my days with Americans and this was a custom I was just not prepared for! 

Playing in the waves in the Mediterranean!!

On Sunday, we went to the cathedral in Valencia and it was absolutely breath taking. I also climbed the tower of the cathedral and was able to see a beautiful view of Valencia! 

The cathedral!

View of the plaza from the tower!

The alter at the cathedral.

After this relaxing weekend, there obviously has to be a little more drama, right? Right. We got to the bus station 2 hours early on Sunday to make sure we'd get on our bus in time, which we did, but once we got to Madrid we had to catch the Metro to take us to our bus from Madrid to Toledo. Needless to say, we found ourselves running through the Metro and yet again through another bus station because we were cutting it close with our time again. We made it to our bus literally right in time and luckily right before the seats had filled up. This weekend really got me exciting for all of the traveling that I plan on doing during my stay in Europe but I really hope that there are no more "Amazing Race" stories because I don't know when my luck will run short! So many adventures to be had in such short time!

I think this just about explains our bus expeiences!

Living Like A Spaniard!

Hola! I have officially been in Toledo for one week and let me tell you, it has been possibly the easiest adjustment I've ever made in my life. The Spanish lifestyle has been very easy for me to accommodate to because it is so relaxed and simple. I have gotten into the habit of taking naps (which will not be any easy habit to break when I get back to MN) and my days feel much longer because meal times are spread out more than I am used to. There's also tranquility in Toledo that I have never experienced anywhere else. I am able to sit in my bedroom with my window open and not hear any cars or chaos. I only occasionally hear dogs, children, or bells. And walking through the streets of Toledo is astonishing to me because I am constantly seeing new things because there are so many little stores squeezed into the buildings.

I also began classes this week and they all seem pretty interesting! I am taking Spanish culture, grammar, art, and linguistics classes along with an internship at a local organization. All of my professors are extremely nice and they're willing to talk to slow for us! (Since Americans tend to talk a little slower!)

I did some roaming around Toledo before classes began and I was able to go to two museums last week. We went to El Museo del Greco first and the paintings looked amazing but unfortunately I'm not too much of an art fanatic.

We also went to La Exhibicion De Instrumentos de Tortura and this was extremely fascinating to me! I think it's obvious was the top picture's intended use was but the bottom picture is of a mask that was used for public humiliation and people were also not able to eat or drink while they were wearing this mask. Let me just say, I am extremely happy that I was not alive when these instruments were used.

There's not a whole lot else to talk about since, like I said, it's pretty laid back here and our days are filled with a lot of hanging out and getting to know people. But...I did book 4 flights to Ireland, Italy, France, and London! So watch out Europe, here I come!

Adios

A New Adventure

Hola todos! Estoy en Espana! I arrived at la fundacion around noon and met my roommate! I must say, we have an amazing view of Toledo.

My roommate and I went roaming around Toledo after our naps and it was quite the adventure. There are no such things as straight or parallel streets in this city! I couldn't tell if I was walking in a street or sidewalk because the streets are so narrow. Toledo has such a great atmosphere that I'm falling in love with already though. All of the restaurants have outdoor seating on plazas and there are so many people walking everywhere. The city has so many beautiful sounds! Lots of church bells and bands playing in the streets but these sounds are just background noise to all of the beautiful architecture I saw today. The Catedral Primada was the first building I stumbled upon and the size and detail of the architecture took my breath away. 

I can't wait to explore the city some more and find more hidden treasures, even though this one wasn't so hidden! Well jet lag is getting the best of me! Good night!

Now What?

My first day back in Minnesota was not what I had expected, but if I've learned anything these past few weeks it's that I shouldn't constantly be setting expectations. I was greeted at the airport by my mom and we were both ecstatic when we saw each other. She was the only person I had consistent contact with while I was in South Africa and I couldn’t wait to see her! We then met my dad, brother, cousin, and cousin’s 3 year old daughter for dinner at my favorite restaurant. I was asked how my trip was but I didn’t feel like this was the time or place to completely indulge them with everything that happened. I was extremely grateful to be with my family and even more grateful that everyone in my family is very healthy. Unfortunately, I couldn’t go home with them because my summer class began the next day so I made my way back to Minneapolis to see my friends.

As I drove back to Minneapolis, I began noticing and appreciating a lot more than I typically do. I had a much more relaxed and grateful feeling about me than I normally did but I also felt very sad and empty. I couldn’t help but wonder who I would be speaking to or what I would be seeing if I were in South Africa. It just simply didn’t feel right to be home. Although I was surrounded by people the moment I walked off the airplane, I felt this immense feeling of loneliness. A sense of disappointment also came over me because I didn’t share the things with my family that I had really wanted to. I didn’t want them to hear about the touristy things that we did. I wanted them to know about the things that significantly impacted me. Why did I feel that a restaurant wasn’t an appropriate place for this? Was I merely trying to provide myself with an excuse in order to protect myself from being vulnerable?  If I couldn’t share these stories and feelings with my family would I be able to share them with anyone else or even my friends?

Friends. These were the people I was most nervous about seeing because I didn’t know how to communicate my new life passions or the distress that I’ve encountered with myself and in others. I was worried that they would mistake my experiences and concerns for arrogance. I was also worried that I would fall back into my same routine with my friends. After being in South Africa, I began to truly appreciate the importance of learning and seeing new things every day. How would I incorporate this into my life when I surround myself with people that may not appreciate the same things? Before going to Guguletu, Aaron warned us not to use our community as a comfort blanket. I’m struggling with how I’m going to do this with my friends. How can they help me understand the things I saw and heard without hindering or protecting me from the emotions that I’m still struggling with?

Today was my first full day back in Minneapolis and my first day of my summer course, counseling psychology. I woke feeling exhausted even though I had slept for 10 hours and I still had a feeling of complete emptiness. I just didn’t know how to make my day useful. Then, I went to my three hour long class and I felt a slight sense of fulfillment. I remembered my desire and love for psychology! After three exhausting and emotionally testing weeks, I needed to be reminded that I can help people with psychology. I don’t need to give everyone money, food, medical assistance, homes, etc. I need to give people my ears (which is ironic because that’s what was emphasized the entire time we were in South Africa) and share the knowledge that I have in order to give people the tools to have a healthier life. The only thing I’m having a difficult time with right now is figuring out what I can do in the meantime. I’m obviously not a licensed psychologist, so I want to narrow down my focus of interest in psychology and become more involved in that. I want to start helping now because I honestly feel like a waste of a person right now since I’m not contributing to society in any major way. And this is where my challenge currently lays…now what?

Thanks for blogging,

Brittany

Good Bye South Africa, For Now

What should I think on my last day in South Africa? I’m very excited to see family and friends but I honestly feel that after my first week home I’m going to want to get on a plane back to Cape Town. I don’t really understand how I’ve become so attached to South Africa in the three short weeks that I’ve lived here. For the last few days I’ve been coming up with excuses to come back here for an even longer amount of time. Maybe grad school, internship, job, travel? I truly fee like Cape Town is home to me now. I don’t know how I made this connection in such a short period of time, especially since we acted like tourists for over a week. I highly encourage everyone to come to South Africa at least once! And don’t just explore the tourist areas but reach a little into the townships and learn about how people really live.

I have a much greater appreciation for life after this trip and I hope that my knowledge of South Africa doesn’t end after this week. My passion of advocating for those who are unable to has been greatly heightened through this experience as well. I’ve met many people that may not even be aware of the impact they’ve had on my life and I will never forget them for that reason. I feel like there are people that I need to say good bye to but I don’t want to. I don’t want this to be the last time I see or speak to the people I’ve met here.

Alan, the supervisor of Arcadia programs in South Africa, and Jane, the project manager, have had a tremendous impact on my experience here. They were the people emailing us before our arrival in South Africa and I assumed we would meet them once or twice but I was wrong. We saw them almost daily while we were in Observatory and they made everything possible for us while we were here. They made sure we were happy and comfortable. The thing that made me the happiest was their ability to be so personal with us. I know many things about them that I would have never imagined having the privilege of knowing. I can’t thank them enough for everything they did and I hope they know they will forever be appreciated.

Although this is my last day in South Africa, I know I will be processing and reflecting on the things I’ve experienced here for a very long time. I don’t know when everything will start making sense or when I’ll understand how to incorporate these things into my life. I’ve slowly been making sense of things for the past week or two and I’m sure I will continue to do so for the next few months at least!

Thanks for blogging,

Brittany

Day of Clarity!

Two things stood out to me during lecture today: presence and unique experiences. Presence was a large part of our lecture today and I was dreading it because I am HORRIBLE at it. I can’t manage to get my thoughts focused. I sat on a balcony this morning in a very peaceful and beautiful area of campus but still my mind wondered. I couldn’t just focus on the simple things in front of me. In our larger group we talked a lot more about this. I noticed that there are so many things in Minneapolis or in my every day that I miss because I don’t take the time to step out of my routines or my tunneled thoughts.

This was also the time that someone brought up that they wish they would have been more present many times last week. I completely agree. Someone then suggested that we may have become less present as a defense mechanism to decrease the harshness of reality. I completely agree with this as well. I should have been more present last week in order to get the maximum potential from this experience, but as Aaron would say, “Are you shoulding all over yourself?” Initially, while wishing I was more present, I felt really guilty and horrible for the people that shared their stories with us. This was the only thing they wanted from us. They didn’t ask for material things or food. They simply wanted our ears and minds. After thinking about it for a little bit, I went back to Aaron’s statement and realized that I need to let it go because what I was able to give at that time was the best I could do. I’m going to make a conscious effort to stop “shoulding all over myself” because that represents regrets to me and I definitely don’t want to hold any regrets in my life.

The next thing that we talked about in lecture that spiked my interest was the differences in experiences that people have. It’s obvious from reading all of our blogs that we each have had very different thoughts and experiences throughout the three weeks that we’ve been in South Africa even though we’ve all shared the same exposure to people and things. What was really interesting to me though was that there was also a missionary group working with the JL Zwane Center while we were there. We ate lunch with them one day but unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, I was having a very emotional day and I was NOT feeling the idea of speaking with high schoolers about their experience in South Africa. Turns out they are staying in a condo-like place near a beach, which is most definitely not in Guguletu, and they made sure they left Gugs by 4:00 pm every day because apparently danger comes out in the dark?? Guess what kids, I survived 5 nights in Gugs and one night I even walked a block in the dark. Sorry for the hostility and sarcasm but this really upsets me. These people are going to go back to America and reinforce the thought that townships, or South Africa, are a dangerous place. As long as you’re not dumb they are safe places. Clearly the experience that we had is much different from the experience they had. (PS I’m not saying that either is experience is more meaningful, but I’d rather have my experience!)

On a side note, we went back to Gugs today for lunch an Mzoli’s! Watch out Famous Dave’s, Mzoli’s definitely has you beat! At first I was nervous to go back because I kind of just wanted to leave the experience where I left it but once we pulled into the township a wonderful feeling came over me. I actually looked at people without having pity or sadness for them. I was able to look at kids without feeling bad for them because I began to notice their smiles and laughter rather than my guilt. I felt like I had a better understanding of the culture and the people and I needed to be removed from it for a few days to appreciate that. Things are finally looking up and starting to make sense! I was looking forward to coming home but now South Africa has a piece of my heart. Hopefully it will be in my future!

Thanks for blogging,

Brittany

An apple a day may or may not keep the doctor away...

I’ve been struggling with topics for a blog so far this week because last week is still weighing on my mind. Yesterday, we went to Robben Island (did you know robben means seal in Dutch?) and I thought I’d have a lot to blog about that but that’s not the case. Don’t get me wrong, it was very interesting to see Nelson Mandela’s prison cell and to learn about the prison directly from an ex-prisoner. I’m just not much of a history buff and I find the issues that are currently happening in the townships are a little more interesting.

I spent 19 of the last 24 hours in bed feeling sick and numerous times I had images of the hospice patients pop into my head. Jane, our mom away from home, checked on me this morning and brought me medicine, food, and water. She reassured me that she would get me to a doctor if I wasn’t feeling better by tonight. I couldn’t help but think about the people we met last week after Jane provided me with such care. I had been sick for 12 hours and was being cared for immediately but there are people within a few miles of me that aren’t receiving care for much more serious illnesses and diseases.

I was also reminded of the problems facing South Africans when the Tutu Tester (a mobile HIV testing center) was set up near our lodge today. These tests are free and in most of the townships people are also given vouchers worth about 10 rand. It is sad to me that people need to have another incentive besides FREE tests in order to find out if they have HIV or not.  I understand that a lot of people don’t want to know because they fear how much it will cost them or they believe they are completely healthy.

I’m obviously still pondering the things I witnessed last week and trying to figure out how to make it effect my life in the most positive way possible. I know I wasn’t brought to South Africa to dwell on the sad things that occur here but I’m having a hard time moving past those sad things. I guess I have a new mission for my summer!

Thanks for blogging,

Brittany

How do I make this all count?

I would like to focus on how these situations will affect me in my future, especially my near future. I haven’t given myself time to reflect on how I’ll be transitioning in these next few weeks and how I’m going to use the information I learned these last two weeks in my life. My biggest fear right now is forgetting.

I’m going to start by recapping with the day that I had the most trouble with because I’m still kind of struggling with it. The experience that stands out to me is the day we went on the hospice visits. Many emotions were brought up this day because of the people we met and circumstances that we saw. The feelings that stand out the most are anger and sadness. I wasn’t able to sort through these feelings on the day we went on the visits and I’m still not quite sure what my next move is with the information I was given that day. I know that I’ll be able to sort through these thoughts one day because I’ve already made progress in appreciating the value on presence instead of dwelling on intrusion. I finally came to the realization that we weren’t intruders in these peoples’ homes but instead we were welcomed guests that acted as a form of therapy.

Although I came to this realization, I’m still having a hard time processing the idea that many people are laying in their beds right now without the proper assistance they need for their conditions. It makes me so mad that the people I saw were only checked on every other day and they were at such a high rate of infection due to the homes they lived in. It makes me even more upset to think about this problem on a global level. How can I, as a caregiver, watch something like this happen without worrying about it? In the US I’d be able to report this to someone and it would be taken care of immediately. I know this is a different country and culture but someone still needs to be able to stand up for the rights and needs of the ill. It seems that there is no one here in charge of the lives being lost and very few people want to be held accountable for their own actions or the actions of others in regards to health. This is when I began to realize that I’m having a really hard time struggling with the transition from Guguletu to Observatory. Although I was looking forward to coming back to Observatory, I don’t know how to make this transition.

My current struggle is trying to figure out how to transition from my life in Guguletu to my life in observatory and how to transition next week back to my American life. As we went on the wine tasting tours on Saturday, I couldn’t focus on the history being thrown at me during our final tour. To me, this information was tedious and unnecessary after the week I had just encountered. I won’t remember the facts that were being thrown at me or the layout of the buildings but I will always remember the layout of the houses I entered in Guguletu and the stories shared with me. I became really frustrated with myself because I have to realize that not many things may seem as important as what I had seen in the townships but I still need to be present in what is happening around me. The things I saw were extremely devastating and I hope I’m only lucky enough to never experience those things in my personal life. I’m also facing the fear of losing touch with the experiences I had in Guguletu. Although I had many moments where I had emotional break-downs and wanted to lock myself in a room alone, I want to hold onto those moments because I feel that those moments were the times I grew the most by pushing through.

This internal struggle was heightened when we tried to enjoy a night out. All I could think about were the superficial things that I was doing, such as putting on make-up, doing my hair, and wearing a dress, while there are still people in Guguletu who aren’t eating and whose homes are being flooded during rainy days and nights. Did the people preparing my meal at the lodge have food for their own family? What were the living conditions of the street vendor that I bought a hot dog from later in the night? The part I’m having the hardest time with is figuring out how I’m going to explain the things I saw and my reactions to my friends and family. I’m afraid that they won’t understand and that because of that I may distance myself from them. I know that I have 15 people who shared this experience with me to talk to about any questions or worries I have but I also want to be able to communicate these worries with ones that are close to me.

I hope I never forget the things I witnessed in Guguletu. I hope these experiences truly impact my life in a long-lasting way. But I hope the relationships that I left at home aren’t damaged because I’m unable to readjust to my life. I need to be very conscious of my efforts to readapt to America but I hope others are also patient about my shift between cultures.

Thanks for blogging,
Brittany

School of Hope

Today was a good way to end the week. We went to Thembalethu School for Children with Special Needs. This was a very uplifting experience because the children were all so happy and the people working there were all so excited about bettering the lives of these children. It was something I really needed to see after the week that I had. I have seriously been considering relocating and continuing my graduate education in South Africa. The opportunities that have been shown to me here appear to be so rewarding.

We ended our visit with the school’s choir performing for us. If I saw any glimpse of hope during this last week it was in these kids. It’s kind of ironic that thembalethu is the Xhosa word for hope. The kids had amazing voices and began dancing during their performance, even the kids in the wheelchairs were dancing! I had a permanent smile on my face during their performance. Aside from all of the other things I’ve seen this week, this school was very well kept and they even had the tools they needed to provide the best care and help for the children.

Leaving Gugs left me with a bittersweet feeling. I was so excited to leave the tragedy and sorrow that I felt in that community but I was also very sad that I was leaving because I felt like I was abandoning the problems presented to me. I will miss the people that we met, especially my host mama and sisi, but I’m happy to be back to a place that won’t constantly remind me that I’m more privileged than a lot of people here. I will forever think of Guguletu and be appreciative of my time there.

Thanks for blogging,

Brittany

Presence

Are you ready for a novel and to see a variety of emotions? I’ll briefly begin with Wednesday. We did some home visits. All 16+ of us would pile into these tiny houses and listen to the stories of people who are victims of HIV, poverty, and apartheid. Many people, including myself, struggled with a feeling of intrusion and lack of privacy. In one situation, we went into a hostile that was the size of 2 queen sized beds. I felt like I was going to a zoo and occasionally asking people questions. These people were literally on exhibit for us. These feelings were contradictory with the messages that we got from people in Gugs because they told us that our presence and ears were extremely valued by the people we met. This was a really hard struggle for me to put on the South African lens and leave behind my cultural norms.

Now Thursday. We did hospice visits and this was by far the most challenging day for me all week for numerous reasons. The first house we went to was actually a shack and there was an HIV positive woman that was bed ridden. She proceeded to tell us that she is tired of white tourists coming into her home, taking pictures of her, and making promises that they don’t follow through with. This instilled the thoughts that I had on Wednesday. This woman couldn’t move her body and her eyes were bulging out of her face like a Holocaust victim. I couldn’t be mad at this woman because of her condition so instead I placed my frustration on Aaron. I was hoping he’d be outside of the shack and that I’d be able to just scream at him. I didn’t know what to do with that experience and I didn’t understand at that time how it benefited my learning experiences. Why would this woman allow us to come into her house if she didn’t feel comfortable with us being there? I now have many perspectives on why this woman may have said the things she did. She could have just been having a horrible day and misplaced her anger on us like I wanted to misplace my anger on Aaron. She also could have just wanted to share her perspective with us to give us another view of what happens in the townships. I now understand that this woman probably didn’t mean to personally attack us or make us feel bad but rather she wanted to vent to us and inform us about her situation. Anger also came from this situation because I got really mad at all the Americans that have every travelled to areas like Guguletu and have made false promises to the people of these places. This is the one thing that we shouldn’t do as global citizens because we are only creating a bad reputation for ourselves.

After this experience we didn’t want to go to the next location but the nurses talked us into it. The next person we visited was HIV positive, lived alone in a shack, and had horrible pressure sores and a colostomy bag. We walked into his shack and I noticed empty bottles of liquor in the corner which raised an alarm about the fact that alcohol counteracts the antiretroviral medication that he’s taking. So basically he’s contributing to his deteriorating health condition but I can’t blame him because I would drink my life away if that were me. The care givers and the man proceeded to unwrap bandages on his leg and butt. He took the bandages off and I saw the worst bed sores I’ve ever seen. There were areas on his butt that were just missing skin and it looked like he had horrible burns. I couldn’t ask him any questions or continue any further because the smell was horrible.

I left that man’s home unbelievably upset with the healthcare system in South Africa. Did I mention that these people are only checked on and changed every other day? I’ve been working with people with mental and physical disabilities for about three years and I can’t even imagine checking on them every other day. These people deserve and need constant care, whether it’s from a family member or nurse. It also upset me because I thought Guguletu had a great sense of community but if so many people are unemployed why aren’t they using their time to care for their community members (as harsh as that may sound). I didn’t find out until our last day that volunteering doesn’t really exist in their community because people are always expecting something in return for their time spent doing something. I guess this makes sense considering the fact that many families don’t have food to feed their children.

As I write this I realize I'm leaving a lot of things out and that the things I got really upset about were just immediate reactions, like Aaron had warned us about. I still have very strong feelings about the things I saw and when I re-read the things I wrote from these two days I still get really upset about these circumstances but I now accept that everything we saw was not to make us feel bad. It wasn’t to make us feel guilty. It wasn’t to make us feel shame or pity for those people that so graciously shared their stories with us. This has been the hardest and most challenging week of my entire life, but it was an eye opening experience that has helped me grow. I pray for these people and I’m much more grateful for the lifestyle that I have. I now accept that I am here to learn and not to change everyone’s lives and the political structure of South Africa. There will always be things out of my control that will bother me and this week has helped me accept this. 

Thanks for blogging,

Brittany

Trying to Feed the World

Food parcel day. We began our day by unloading the truck and stacking the bags of sugar, beans, rice maize, etc. This was a lot of fun for me and we sang and joked while we did this. As we were doing this people started sitting around watching us waiting for their food parcel. I sat down with a man named Cornelius and had a very brief conversation with him. He told me he had two kids and his mother lived with them. The only things I could concentrate on while I was talking to him were the smell of his breath and his eyes. His breath took my breath away because it literally made me nauseas and it stuck with me all day. His eyes were filled with exhaustion and stress. I’ll come back to Cornelius later.

The distribution of food parcels finally began and the way the names of people receiving the parcels reminded me of graduation day and, sadly, people expressed the same joy that’s often shown on graduation day. Many of us were told we were angels, told “I love you,” and were given hugs. This struck me so much because these people were so grateful for the very little act that we did that day. I didn’t even buy the food. All I did was stack and carry it outside to cars or shopping carts for them. I broke down when the reverend announced to the people of Gugs that we were going to take a break to eat lunch because we were hungry. How could I go eat a huge meal that was prepared for me when there were still people waiting for food that haven’t eating in a day or two? And how could I eat when Cornelius’ breath was still lingering in my nose? I was so mad at myself for taking that break. My mood changed when I walked out of the church after lunch and Cornelius came up to me, gave me a hug, and said that I was a kind person and he hopes to see me in Guguletu again in the future. Again, I had a breakdown because I realized that the conversation I had with him meant something to him. Although I thought he didn’t open up to me much during our conversation, he truly appreciated my interest in him.

And now comes the most touching story I’ve heard and the reason I now believe in fate. Kwanele rode in our van while we did home drop-offs for the food parcels. He helped us unload food but we didn’t really engage in conversation with him. I decided to stay in the van during our last stop but Kelsey came out and told me to come in immediately. The house ended up being Kwanele’s house. His brother, who drinks all day, lives in a shack behind his house. Kwanele is in high school and lives alone because his dad passed away in 2005 and his mom passed away last month. He said that his dream is to attend UCT and he even had the undergrad catalog which he said he reads a lot to better understand what he needs to do to achieve his goal. I realized I still had the card from the founder of These Numbers Have Faces, the organization that helps pay for students’ tuitions. I gave him the card and told him he needed to contact this person. He smiled at me and said he would find a very safe place for it. We exchanged names in order to find each other on Facebook. I am determined to follow up with him and make sure he makes his dreams come true. Looking back on my week, this is the moment that sticks out the most because I was able to provide someone with a resource and glimpse of light. I felt so useless and hopeless the rest of the week because I know I can’t solve the world’s problems and there is nothing that I could do to fix the situations that many people were in. Kwanele provided me with my glimpse of light for the week.

My main take away from this day was resilience, especially in Kwanele. These people are faced with daily struggles but are still so hopeful and happy. I understand that this is how they were raised and this has become their culture but I’m convinced that resiliency is a part of their daily lives. 


Thanks for blogging,
Brittany

AIDS Man

Sex. Why is this word and act thrown around so casually? I’m not trying to preach about saving sex for marriage but why do people, especially young adults and teens, feel sex is a liberating act? Many serious consequences come from sex including HIV, STI’s, pregnancy (which can lead to poverty for many teens), and mental health issues. How do we begin educating you on valuing sex again without sounding like we’re forcing religious views onto people while also educating them on being safe if they decide to have sex?

These thoughts all came after speaking with Lumkile, “AIDS Man”, from the Treatment Action Campaign. He told us to call him AIDS Man because he has no shame in having AIDS and then he shared is story with us. He was tested three different times for HIV and all three times he tested positive but he didn’t believe it until the third time. He figured that he didn’t feel sick so he couldn’t be sick. After the third test he started placing blame on all the women he’d had sex with but quickly realized he could only blame himself because HE got himself drunk and HE didn’t use a condom. He also went through a phase for six months where he locked himself in his apartment and just watched movies because he figured he was going to die soon. He realized he had to accept himself and that he didn’t have to die. His mission now is to convince people who are HIV positive that they don’t have to die and they can in fact live a fulfilling life with HIV.

Lumkile also pointed out that gender based violence is a huge issue. Police will question women to try to shift the blame on the victims of rape with questions like, “Why are you walking around so late? Why are you wearing that outfit?” Rape cases also take a long time for cases to go to Congress. Some cases last up to six years and are delayed up to thirty times. I think this was a great example of the progress that still needs to be taken towards gender quality. Why should a woman be questioned about her behaviors or appearance after she reports rape? I couldn’t help but being in the shoes of one of these women because I would just give up. I would be so hurt that because of my gender it would be assumed that I would be questioned for asking to be raped.

Our night ended by meeting people from the organization These Numbers Have Faces. This organization helps pay for students’ tuition fees at universities but in return they have to do this for their community. This was very inspirational because it was good to hear that these students are not only able to get an education but they are also learning how to give back to their community. This was an encouraging way to end our day! 
And I’m looking forward to food parcels tomorrow!


Thanks for blogging,
Brittany

Hello Gugs!

My first day in Guguletu was a day of mixed emotions. I started out feeling scared as we drove by shacks with tin roofs that had rocks on the roofs to keep them from flying off. Houses had bars on windows and doors for protection from unwanted visitors. Our driver didn’t help my nerves by telling us that he never comes to Gugs and warned us not to try to be brave Americans by walking around drawing attention to ourselves. He specifically said not to even think of leaving the house after dark. I’m sure you can imagine where my fear was coming from hearing this from someone who lives near Gugs. I was also very nervous because everywhere we drove people were staring at us through the windows. We weren’t even out in public yet and we were drawing attention to ourselves.

Then, we arrived at the JL Zwane Center. We attended a church service there and I felt very awkward walking in there because were the ONLY white people and Xhosa was the primary language being spoken (I think they only spoke English because we were there). My nerves quickly settled when I realized how warm and welcoming everyone at the JL Zwane Church is. We received so many smiles, hand-shakes, and hugs, which was very reassuring. The service began with the reverend talking about being able to go to your neighbor’s house to borrow sugar. The girl next to me asked if we did that in the US and I said not really, at least not at my house because we just go to the store. I began wondering why my mom, or myself, doesn’t go to our neighbor more often. I then began thinking about the value of community. It was very obvious during the service that community is a large part of life in Gugs. Everyone was talking, singing, and dancing during the service I’m becoming convinced that the US values independence more than community.

I couldn’t tell if it was the fact that the congregation was able to all be together at the same time or if it was their faith that brought pure happiness to them during the service. All of the women were singing at the top of their voices and pulling us into the aisles to dance with them as if they didn’t have a care in the world. Obviously they have many concerns such as poverty, HIV, TB, violence, rape, etc. At this point my emotions changed from worried to comfort because I knew if these people could be happy, I could be too. My eyes began watering after 5 minutes of the service just watching the joy of the congregation. After mass we talked to some local youth and this revealed a lot about the similarities between us. They attend school, love partying and shopping, and want to move out of their parents’ homes soon! This also brought me back down to earth because I remembered that, even though they face different struggles than I do, we’re all just young adults.

My last and final stop of the day was Thotho’s house, my host mom. I walked in and was instantly greeted. She gave me the biggest hug I’ve had in a while and I instantly felt safe and extremely grateful. I also met Sinazo, Thotho’s 14 year old granddaughter, who lives with Thotho. In Xhosa, Sinazo means having everything, the perfect name for this BEAUTIFUL young woman. I later found out that she lives with her grandmother because her parents work in Port Elizabeth and she didn’t want to leave Guguletu. Sinazo is just like any other teenager that enjoys dancing, singing, fashion, and soap operas!

I didn’t think that I would be able to sleep at all this week because I’d be too scared and on edge but thanks to Thotho I no longer feel that way. The kind hearts of everyone here and the value of community made me feel right at home. I was happy to see, and I’m sure my mom will be glad to know, that Thotho’s house had gates over the windows and doors like most houses in Cape Town and she does live in a house, not a shack. She has running water along with electricity. Her house is quite nice actually. 

Thanks for blogging,

Brittany

Time for Reflection

In the last few days I’ve been exposed to “The Tale of Two Cities.” As we drive through Cape Town, we have seen instances where there will be million rand houses on one side of the street and tin shacks on the other side of the narrow street. The houses look nice and most of them have gates guarding their doors along with armed response signs.  Many shacks consist of tin roofs and are not equipped with any sort of security measure. These are clearly contrasting qualities of life and it’s astonishing that it occurs within such a small space.

The thing I’m struggling with the most is how the people that live in the houses can live with themselves without feeling like complete jerks. In the US, trailer courts are often in a secluded section of a city or town. I always thought this was because trailer courts were thought to be shameful and the city wanted to hide them. But, I began wondering the other day if it was actually for a different reason. Both of my reasons are probably completely wrong, but maybe trailer courts are secluded because people in houses felt pity on those in the trailer court and didn’t want to flaunt their lifestyles. The problem with secluding townships though is that they wouldn’t be secluded, but rather the houses would be secluded because they appear to be outnumbered. I can’t make sense of how such a tragic life can exist in such a beautiful. I guess the phrase a beautiful mess is a good description of the lives of many in South Africa.

After listening to Alison describe her experience in townships and her goal of getting abused children out of townships really made me question why any families stay there. I understand that there are financial and discriminatory reasons like District 6 for townships existing but then why are there houses in townships? If families are able to afford a house why wouldn’t they move out of the township? My goal for the homestay is to get a better grasp on the values of community because a loyalty to community is the only reason I can think of right now for families to remain townships. Does a commitment to family and your community mean that you have to risk your health and safety in order to be near the ones you care about? Understanding “The Tale of Two Cities” may be my toughest challenge while being here but I hope I get better insight.

Also, this is a struggle for me to wrap my head around because I think to myself that it would be so easy to break this vicious cycle if only people could be as courageous as Alison. But, possibly the people of the townships think that if they were to leave the township the violence and health issues would follow them, so what’s the point in leaving. I was just about to suggest that education could be a solution but then I realized there would also need to be a large job demand. Although I want to have a deeper understanding for the socioeconomic structure of South Africa, I know that I won’t be able to even begin to think of solutions because this is clearly one of the greatest adaptive challenges that I’ve observed. I hope next week will shed some like on this tragic issue by speaking to people of Guguletu and JL Zwane but I don’t think I’ll ever be able to fully comprehend it.

Thanks for blogging,

Brittany

My Pseudo Life

I am exhausted! This has been the busiest week of my life but everything has been so entertaining and a once in a lifetime experience. Today we went on a safari at the Inverdoorn Game Reserve and let me tell you something, it DOES get cold in South Africa. I was wearing a long sleeve, fleece, and raincoat along with a snuggie type poncho they provided for us and I was still chilly! It was great though. We saw cheetahs which are possibly the most beautiful animals I’ve ever seen. We also saw giraffes, lions, zebras, and an eagle. By the way, our safari guide was VERY HANDSOME. I might bring him back home with me with my new penguin too!  

I think that’s all I have to say today because I’m way too tired to process thoughts and I need to pack for our week in the township! P.S. I won’t be blogging for a week because I won’t have access to a computer/internet! I’ll have a lot to write about in a week!

Thanks for blogging,

Brittany

Nervous Wreck

Hello everyone! I had the privilege of being on top of Table Mountain today! Google it if you haven’t seen it because it’s delightful! I was over 3,000 feet above sea level and have never been such a nervous wreck. The view was gorgeous and nothing in my life, not even the birth of a child or a wedding day, could surpass the beauty of standing on top of a mountain. I can’t explain how amazing it was so I’m sorry for the lack of information and visual aid that I’m giving here! Fun fact: Dossies (google a picture of it) are most closely related to African Elephants. And I’m probably bringing one home with me! I also learned how to speak another language this morning! (HA! Barely!) We had a quick lesson on the language of Xhosa and this language includes clicks! A very difficult sound to perfect but it is one of the coolest things to hear. I’ll be giving Xhosa lessons when I get home for about R100 (100 Rand) a lesson. J

On Sunday we’re leaving our lodge in Observatory to be staying with a host family for one week in the township of Guguletu. Nekey and I are staying with a grandmother and her fourteen year old granddaughter. The last two days I’ve become really nervous about this experience and it’s really disappointing me because this was the part of the course that I was looking most forward to. I think this anxiety set in after driving around Cape Town and previewing the conditions that many families in townships live in. How can I possibly prepare myself for something that I’m not exposed to in the US and know nearly nothing about? I think the biggest challenge that I’m going to face is to know that others are much less privileged than I am. I think I’m going to be devastated when I begin seeing that people’s NEEDS aren’t being fulfilled but my WANTS have been. The only thing I keep reminding myself is that I can’t change every person’s life in a township by handing out money (which I don’t even have!). It’s just difficult for me because my heart already hurts for the kids that I will be meeting. Kids will definitely be my soft spot.

I’m also getting really disappointed with myself because I keep becoming fearful for my safety next week. This is irritating to me because I shouldn’t be making judgments based from stereotypes and I’ve been reassured numerous times by Aaron that the families we’re staying with are upstanding in their communities and live in houses, not shacks. I’m aware of my misconceptions but something in my gut just won’t let them go. I don’t want these misconceptions to hold me back in my experience at the township. The only expectation I had from this trip was to gain the most knowledge and insight while staying in the township and I don’t want that expectation to be failed because of my petty fear.

Ok, this is a short one because I still need to write a paper. It’s 8:15 PM and I need to get up at 6:30 AM for our safari! So hopefully my blog tomorrow will include giraffes, elephants, zebras, lions, cheetahs, and a whole lot more of animals from the wild kingdom! Watch out Rafiki, here I come!

Thanks for blogging,

Brittany

A Day of Beauty

Today was possibly the most exciting and uplifting day of my life! We went to Boulder’s Penguin Colony and, if you haven’t guessed by now, saw PENGUINS! The penguins at the zoo do not do justice for penguins in their real habitat. It was amazing to see these little creatures standing amongst the crashing waves of the ocean and the mountains in the background. A motherly feeling came over me as I watched the penguins (possibly because I wanted to snatch one up and bring it back to the states) because they seemed to be so peaceful yet aware of their surroundings. There were so many penguins that would look up at us and just stare at us with the same curious eyes that we had for them. Bottom line, I love penguins. Our next stop was Cape Point, the most southern point of South Africa. On our way there we encountered some baboons! The funny thing about baboons is that they are extremely dangerous and we had to keep our windows rolled up as we drove near them! The baboons were quite opposite of the penguins because they were not aware of their surroundings AT ALL! There were cars everywhere but the baboons didn’t budge and weren’t threatened at all. It was very interesting and exciting to see these creatures in their natural habitats.

After a hike up a mountain, which I’m sure I’ll be feeling in my quads and butt tomorrow, I had the amazing pleasure of being able to have a view of the beautiful coastline, ocean, sky, sun, everything of South Africa. Words and pictures cannot do justice for what I saw today. The beauty of nature cooperating together and the colors all perfectly complimenting each other brought such a serene feeling about me. Although there were many people around me, I felt so isolated but completely satisfied. I hope everyone is able to experience the same thing I was able to feel at that point. We also walked further out to the point and this required walking along a tiny path on the edge of a cliff. I was shaking with every step I took in fear of falling into the ocean but the instant I saw the view at the edge of the cliff all of that anxiety left me. I had a smile from ear to ear (literally) and couldn’t stop my disbelief. It was such a great experience and something I will never forget. After the long hike up the mountain we went to Mariner’s Wharf, right next to the Atlantic Ocean, for some fish and chips! Such a refreshing meal after a little hike!

After looking at the beautiful landscape of Cape Town I couldn’t help but think about the differences between the people and the land. I couldn’t help but notice the diversity in animals and plants (I mean there is a mountain and an ocean which, to me, are very contrasting things) and relate that to the people of South Africa. Also, I couldn’t believe how unbelievably amazing (and I know I’ve said this numerous times now) the ocean and the mountains looked together. The harshness of the mountains outlined in the deep blue of the ocean was shockingly beautiful. To me, this signified the future that South Africa is looking for. Although opposite things exist in nature it is possible to make them flatter each other.

The last part of our night was our meeting with Alison Alexander. Words can’t even explain the heart that this woman has. She started an organization called The Rainbow House which houses abandoned, abused, and neglected children. She started this in her home in a township and then made it bigger by moving it to a house in a suburb. She also did this because she wanted to remove the kids from the townships since she didn’t want them placed back into the vicious cycle of the townships. She currently houses 13 children (one of them is her adopted child) and she provides phenomenal care for them. She understands that the intervention for these children is essential in their rescue process. This spoke to me on so many levels. Hello, I’m a psychology major. If money were not an issue for me, I would volunteer every second of my life for this woman and help these children understand their exposure to rape, incest, alcohol, etc. I want to do this so badly but I don’t know how to make it work which makes me really sad. I was so motivated by everything she was saying and agreed with along of her goals and visions but my heart broke as soon as I came back to reality. I wish the best for Alison and I hope we will be able to visit her at The Rainbow House in two weeks.

I was going to try to keep this blog short so I’m very sorry but there’s a lot going on here and a lot on my mind! Anyhow, I’m off to read and go to bed because we’re exploring Table Mountain tomorrow!

Thanks for blogging,

Brittany

Tale of Two Cities

Wednesday was the day of museums!  But first, Alan gave us some history about South Africa. I usually think history is a bore but Alan said something that really spiked my interest in the subject. “I love history because it makes sense of my present.” This statement explains perfectly the current state and the history of Africa. We learned a lot about the history of the Dutch and the Khoisan in South Africa. As ignorant as this may sound, I had never realized that slavery occurred in Africa. I’ve always been so aware of the American history of slavery that it never occurred to me that this happened all over the world. The fascinating thing about slavery in South Africa is that the slaves were brought over from Indonesia because it was thought that the Khoisan were too incompetent to do the duties of a slave. One question that popped into my head was why would the Dutch feel as though they could take the land of the Khoisan’s and then turn them into their property? Why was this so popular all throughout history? What was it about most settlers (or possibly invaders?) that made them segregate and find differences rather than learn from and cooperate with the people that were originally on that land? It made me question whether this was an innate behavior for human beings. Do people truly assume the worst in others before giving everyone the benefit of the doubt? I wonder how we can break this cycle of feelings of superiority which seems to reoccur, even in our current society.

Quick lesson: The Khoisan people were Africans in the southern tip of South Africa and had lighter colored skin, whereas the Nguni people were from the north and had a much darker colored skin. Alan explained to us that this piece of history has become a contemporary issue for the people of South Africa. Many people have identity issues due to characteristics such as skin color and language (nine different languages are spoken in South Africa) and these identity issues change from generation to generation. This was interesting to me because these ancestors were from the same country but there was still a lot of diversity among them. This diversity can be seen now walking down the streets of Cape Town. There are a lot of coloured (mixed) and black people and some white people. The variety of race, languages, religion (or lack thereof), and politics is absolutely fascinating and I can’t even begin to fathom the time that it will take to create a sense of unity for the citizens of South Africa. Nelson Mandela was on heck of a good leader and a very clever man for the amount of unity he had created during the aftermath of apartheid. Some of us have experienced a lot of what Americans would consider rude behavior but I just wonder if it’s because of the color of our skin, which they may associate with privilege, or if this is a custom of theirs. Possibly, manners and customer service aren’t as valued here as they are in the US.

The diversity that I explained before may not be too shocking to Americans because we too experience a lot of diversity. But, I don’t think we experience the poverty that I have been seeing and “The Tale of Two Cities,” as Alan would call it. It’s astonishing to me to drive around Cape Town because there will be million dollar houses on one side of the mountain, street, or city (you name it) and then on the opposite side there will be townships of shacks. Shacks that are, literally, made out of tin roofs and pieces of wood. Some of these “houses” don’t even have doors and luckily they are in Africa because these families, sadly, wouldn’t survive a Minnesota winter. The shacks are piled one on top of the other and it is just the saddest looking community ever. I can’t wrap my head around how the people in the million dollar communities can look across the street at the kids living in tin roofs with wood panels without feeling constant guilt and a need to help. Or…how the people in the shacks can bare to look across the street at the million dollar houses without feeling anything but rage and torment. I look at the nice houses in the community and feel complete anger. This is something I don’t think I’ll ever be able to understand and unfortunately I don’t think I’m able to scream at these people that flaunt their money with such a lack of compassion for those that they neighbor. It’s probably one of the most frustrating things for me to witness thus far and I’m just trying to figure out how I’m going to live in that situation next week.

Now on to the activities of the day! We went to the Castle of Good Hope first and saw a reenactment which they lit a cannon! The Castle of Good Hope was used for military purposes and was built by the Dutch. This was a very interesting museum and we were even able to go into the torture room and black hole which was a dark room that people were sent to after the torture room. We also saw a table that seated over 100 people! One thing I admired while walking through the museum was all of the paintings. I began to take interest in the perspectives of the people painting the pictures because I think that could be a very biased representation of history at that point in time. Next, we went to the Slavery Museum. WOW! I can’t even begin to express the sorrow and guilt I feel for everything that each slave went through. The dignity and identity that was stripped of these people is completely distressing. Slaves were sometimes named after the months that they arrived, animals, food, and even where they arrived from. How disappointed and worthless would you feel if someone took away your name and named you “Minnesota” or “Sweet Potato” (Sweet Potato was a real name)? I’ve always know how badly slaves were treated and how degrading the act of slavery was and it’s always made me furious but this museum brought a sense of peace to me because it was dedicated to the abolition of slavery and giving recognition to those who suffered from this injustice. This museum also included a huge gallery of information about Nelson Mandela which was very informative but also very overwhelming! Our final destination includes the District 6 Museum. Another history lesson: District 6 was an area of Cape Town in which people were kicked out of their homes and literally forced to wonder the streets, homeless, with all of their belongings. The reason for the people being kicked out of their homes was because that area of the city had been declared an area for whites only and this just happened in 1966. This museum displayed pictures of District 6 before and after the removal of families and was also a place for many families to psychologically reclaim their homes in District 6. Sadly, much of District 6 was never developed and still remains bare today, which is very disappointing and upsetting to me. I don’t understand why hundreds or thousands of families were removed from their homes just so the land could remain unused.

I know that’s a lot to take in and lot of information thrown out at once. I hope it makes sense because honestly I’m still trying to make sense of it all. It’s just absolutely fascinating that all of this history is so recent and the process of the abolition of slavery and discrimination is still a baby in comparison to America’s history. Tomorrow’s blog will be a much more light hearted, I think, and I hope everyone enjoyed their brief South Africa history lesson!

Thanks for blogging,

Brittany

50 Rand...to post this blog!

I’M HERE and currently having a blog party!! We arrived in Cape Town at 9:30 PM (2:30 PM MN) after 23 hours of travel time! The first flight was 8 hours long followed by a 4 hour layover and our final flight was 11 hours. Even though 19 hours on a plane may sound dreadful, it was actually a lot of fun. The first flight took us to Amsterdam and this flight was the worse of the two. My body was in so much pain and my brain was becoming unbelievably bored! Our layover in Amsterdam (which Kendall that was in Germany) cost me ten dollars or about 18 euros for a delicious omelet at the Alice in Wonderland restaurant! This was also a time for our group of 15 people to joke and get to know each other. The second flight was my absolute favorite, except for the 2 year old screamer sitting directly behind me that pooped his pants TWICE! We were given food almost every hour, I was able to lay down due to the lack of people on the flight, and the movie selection was fantastic! P.S. I’m going to be constipated for the next three weeks because cheese has been shoved in my face non-stop for the last two days! But anyway…the flight attendants weren’t too friendly and Shane even had one flight attendant tell him to “Get organized”! None of our flights were delayed and no one lost their luggage! Overall, an amazing bonding experience for our group (which I think Aaron had intended) and a great start to our trip in Cape Town.

We had arrived at the end of a stormy day in Cape Town and since it was dark outside we weren’t able to see very much. I can tell you this much, I’m getting to experience the spring that Minnesota decided to skip this year! I can’t complain at all about the weather we had today. It was about 60 degrees with very light rain for a little bit of the day. The climate is very interesting here because there is a constant dampness about the air but the temperature is still refreshing. The scenery and foliage here is to die for. Everything is this beautiful green color and the vines on the buildings around campus were a deep gorgeous red. The fact that Table Mountain is also the backdrop of the city makes the view even more delightful! It was incredible to see the architecture of the University of Cape Town’s campus.  The old architecture of the campus complimented the modern buildings in downtown Cape Town. It was so interesting to see the contrasting old buildings throughout the city with the new, modern buildings.

Events of Day 1: Attending our first class on the University of Cape Town campus, going on a bus tour around Cape Town, eating an authentic South African dinner, and listening to South African music. First of all, my day started with an interesting shower. Do you like hot or cold showers? Well, my mom always yelled at me for using up all of the hot water and leaving her with cold water. Mom, you can’t yell at me anymore because I experienced a much colder shower than you’ve ever experienced! The funny thing is the water would be scolding hot for about 45 seconds and then it would become freezing (literally, FREEZING) cold. Our breakfast was cereal and toast but we weren’t sure if we were using milk or creamer for our cereal! The breakfast was very good and started our day out well. Next we went to campus and briefly introduced ourselves to Alan and Jane, our Arcadia University hosts in Cape Town. Alan and Jane are two great people that luckily have the same sense of humor that our group has! Alan also bought us some snacks during our city bus tour and they were absolutely delicious. One of them was kuch sister, with Alexis asking if there was a twin sister, and this was a cinnamon tasting pastry! Very good! I can’t remember the name of the other tasty snack but it was deep fried (YUM) with mincemeat and a cabbage type food mixed with it. It also had a hint of spice…..SO GOOD!

To sum it all up, today was the day that this all became reality. Alan had told us that the Western Cape province is the only province in which coloured people are the majority and more than 38% if households live in poverty but at the same time the Western Cape is the second most wealthy province in South Africa. My goal for the following weeks is to make sense of this but I know I may not be able to. How can a wealthy province still be experiencing such poverty? How is it that the part of Cape Town I was able to experience today accounts for only about 10% of the population here? Why does so much diversity exist in such a relatively some area of space and how can you unify the diversity? I hope I’ll find out more about these things by getting to know the people of Cape Town and Guguletu. I can’t wait for what the next couple weeks have to offer and I will be updating you all frequently on the activities we’ll be doing!

Thanks for blogging,

Brittany

Finally Reality!

A lot has happened in the last few weeks and tomorrow is finally the day I leave for South Africa. The nerves are beginning to set in. I'm becoming very anxious about how I'm going to pass the time on our 22 hour flight as well as how I'm going to overcome the jet lag! I'm also really nervous because I still haven't been able to accept the fact that I'll be in South Africa for three weeks. I'm worried that I'm not in the right state of mind and that arriving in Cape Town will be something I'm not quite prepared for. But I suppose I can prepare during the flight!

I'm also very excited for many things. I can't wait for the site seeing such as, going to Robben Island, visiting museums, shops, and beaches with penguins, and, of course, going on a safari! I can't wait to experience a new culture that I never thought I'd have the opportunity to experience! I'm most excited to meet my host family, a grandmother and her 14 year old granddaughter. I can't wait to develop relationships with these two people and I have a feeling that I will learn the most from them during my stay in South Africa. When I tell people that we will be staying in a township for a week, their reactions are most often worry and shock. Many people have this perception that townships are a very unsafe and unhealthy place to live, but I look forward to finding out for myself what the environment of townships are truly like.

Something I've been thinking about a lot this past week is how I'm going to integrate what I learn and the experiences I have into my life when I come back to the US. I don't want to forget about the people I meet and the things I learn during my short time in Cape Town. How will I use the things I learn to make myself a better person and to better understand my global identity? I hope that all of this will make more sense to me within the next few weeks or when I return. Well, the next time I'll be blogging will be when I'm in Cape Town! I hope the flight goes smoothly and I can't wait for what's ahead of me!

Thanks for blogging,
Brittany

31 Days and Counting!

Only a month left until I board the plane to South Africa! It's becoming really hard to focus on school and I can't even begin to imagine the lack of focus I'll have during finals week. We had our last pre-departure meeting on Saturday and I think it was a well needed six hours spent together. I have a really good feeling about all of the people taking this course with me. Everyone seemed to mesh very well and I can tell we are going to have a lot of fun! We all expressed worries and excitements on Saturday that really got me thinking about this experience. Why be nervous or anxious? All the classes I've been taking have been teaching me to step outside of the comfort zone, so why am I fearing it so much? I finally convinced myself not to!

Right now I'm in a state of mind that is allowing me to be completely open minded. The idea of having no growth in the comfort zone and no comfort in the growth zone has been a way that I've wanted to live my life but I always gave myself the excuse that I didn't have opportunities to step outside of the comfort zone. No more excuses for me and definitely NO excuses while I'm in Cape Town. The only worry I currently have about the trip is packing which seems pretty superficial to me. But I really have no idea what to pack and I also have no idea what to buy my host family. I figure that if these are my only current worries I'm in a good place. Two weeks ago I was having nervous break downs every other day and now I've finally realized that there's nothing worth worrying about because this is an opportunity of a lifetime.

My wonderful friend, Anna, just asked me what I'll miss the most while I'm gone. This is a great question. My mom would want me to say that I'll miss her, which I will, but besides people what will I miss? I know I will  miss my cell phone the least because I feel like this is what causes much of my lack of attentiveness right now. Having access to texting, Facebook, email, and internet on my phone allows for too many possibilities of being contacted and I feel I rarely have a moment to myself. I think I'll be much more present during my days spent in South Africa for the sole reason that technology will be eliminated from my everyday use.

But...I should probably start studying for my spanish exam that I have tomorrow :( Sorry about the choppy, random thoughts that went into this (very distracted right now)! No more daydreaming for this girl!

Thanks for blogging!
Brittany

And the journey begins....

First of all, I'd like to thank Matt Miller for my blog name because I'm not creative and needed some assistance with a clever name! A little over 6 weeks until I embark on my journey to South Africa. Words can't even express the emotions and feelings I am experiencing with the departure date quickly approaching. A lot of anxiety around packing, traveling, and money, but A LOT of excitement about the new culture and communities I'm going to have the privilege of experiencing.

I never thought I'd be going to a place like South Africa but the more I reflect on my decision of this opportunity the more I realize this exactly what I need to do. The main goal I have for myself through this course is to broaden my perspective on global issues. I feel I often become consumed with the petty stresses of a college student and I forget about the real struggles that many face on a daily basis. I get butterflies in my stomach each time I think about how fast May 22nd is approaching because it's still not quite a reality to me yet.

This isn't going to be the most insightful blog but I do hope that whoever reads this will appreciate and learn a little from my experiences. I don't anticipate to understand everything that I see or encounter while I'm in South Africa but I hope that this blog will be a place for me to sort through the confusing or challenging things I see during this course. My biggest fear about going to South Africa is that I won't be completely present in every moment and that I won't appreciate everything that is being offered. I don't want to just be in South Africa, I want to participate in everything possible.

Well, I think this is the end of my first post because I can't stop thinking about the other 174 things on my to-do list right now (many of those things are for South Africa!). Can't wait to continue with this and thanks for reading!

Glad we could blog together,
Brittany